Confession.  I have shower anxiety.

As in, I can contemplate taking a shower for about an hour or more at a time. It’s a real issue I think, angsting over your bathtime from 2:30-midnight.  What is that about?  Do YOU get shower anxiety?  Here are a few symptoms, read them over and if you have >2 you’re pretty much diagnosed.

What if the hair doesn’t dry in time?  If it doesn’t, how important is it you need to look real that evening? If yes then the straightener will be required, and possibly curling iron. Yes, both, what if the hair gets too straight?  Needs taming? Falls off your head during a procedure?  That’s what the hair feathers are for  right? Replacing M.I.A. hair?

You still haven’t picked up more shaving cream, therefore shaving is more hazerdous then average (that’s assuming you even tried to…thank goodness for pants season.)

You fear falling on your razor, the thought alone can keep you cowering from the shower for 24 hours, and when you force yourself in there you focus on your feet-to-floor friction like it’s your job.

You eat marshmallows to avoid the shower. (and all other responsibilities)

Does rain count? Uhhh maybe. If you use deodorant?

Experiencing any of these? Sorry.

Here’s Some Shower-Tunes to ease the anxiety and dare I say-make showering fun!

Hello-Martin Solveig & Dragonette-Dear Shower, I could stick around and get along with you, don’t get too excited, you’re alright but I’m here to enjoy the bubble party.

Helena Beat-Foster the People-“so I don’t fall that way” aka the razors!!

Fistful of Sand (The Moon Version)-The Bravery

The Spectrum Song-have some fun with the soap!

Kiss with a Fist-Florence and the Machine-If I were to have a song about my relationship to the shower…

Teenage Dream-Katy Perry -my teenage dream is to take that shower.



Escape-Enrique Inglesias -this song can actually carry you out of the shower too! Sort of a multi-use tune 😉

Under Pressure-Queen-if you’re lucky your shower has it

Forever-Walter Meego-I don’t have forever to take this shower. let’s wrap it up now.

*I feel like I should clear it up -regardless of my feelings towards the shower, I do in fact bathe.*



2 thoughts on “Showering.

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